[Diriku] ::: Tak pernah rasa _______________....

Sad right...??
but..it was  happend to mylife...
since i was a boy...
i live without a normal life as MAN...
friends..? never treat me as MAN..
i'm bullied..everyday...without any human sense give it to me..
but dad...always protect me from them...
he's a teacher at my school...so..
he can keep full attention to me..
everytime i had disturb N been bullied, he came N' scold them..
and this make them mad to me..
so..they would never being my friend...
they told me..i'm a coward..
i didn't asked to doin' like that..
at the same time..i felt alone..
from i was a boy...till now as a teenagers..
my father always keep on eyes to me...
so..can i be a great teenagers...?? eemmm...


now..at the date 9th April 2011..
i still separate from 'man'...
i still ignored..being apart from them..
i want...! i want live in their colonies...
goin' out together...
shopping for groceries...
dates..N' others...
but how..? when can i got it...? is it impposible for me..??
OR that's my fate..? always beside N' protected by 'gurls' outthere..? OR protected by my dad till i'm 20 OR 30..??
eeeexxxxxxxxxppplllllllllllaaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnnnnn...!!

i want a NORMAL life...!!!!!!!!
who can give me...?
enough...! 

[LOVE] :: Fair...?? Square..?? Is it..??

I looked on my admired fB account just now...
She have someone..
N i accpeted she has someone special in her life...
i still wonder..
N i believe..in this world we must put a lot of effort on everything we want...
World is FAIR...
i agree..

FAIR with what...??
Beautiful with the handsome...??
N Handsome fix for beautiful...??
so..what bout the ugly..??
is it just for an ugly..??
is that the FAIR means..??

i scared with tha world nowdays..
it all bout OUTSIDE...!! not bout the inner personnality...
please human...choose 'someone' based on their future...attitude...
it'll gurantee u'll forever with them...

However,, choice in your HAND...
grab the BEST for the BEST...

[Holiday] :: Finally almost END..!

finally..!
my holiday goin' to last...
arrgghh..! xcukup..
i want more...! 2 weeks OR a month...hahahhaha

it'sookay..
scared there's a lot work need to b settle there...
i didn't get any notes yet...xsignment...heeiisshh..
what bout my passes/skiped class...hahahahah
sengal jerrkk..!

Oh my..
tomorrow the last day...then back to Shah Alam...
then, i'm back with what...??
i didn't hve any transport...
My Gen2 roadtax are expired...
Kancil...my father used it..
KTM...??
errr....how to use it...?? i can't..
errmmm....mcm xbg balik jerr....jom sambung cutiiii...!HAHAHAHAHAH~~~

How ever...life must go on..!
Bye Seremban...Bye n9..
n' here i come Shah Alam...

[Haitii] ::: .M.A.S.A

"Andai dapatku undur masa"


Ofkos...everybody make mistake..!
but..they will realize after they got caught..!
that's normal..
just make it simple..after a mistake..u must leave it..if not..
u'll b like that for ever..!


But..
what i've done...???
damn..!
because of my stupid behaviour i made FUCK decision...!
i leaves who are really needs me..!
i betrayed my promise to my beloved friends...
i made all dispointed..
selfish..! i felt guilty right now..
they need u 'tengku'...!
they'll never moved out to expressed thierself...
errrmmm...
is't my mistake...? what i've done...??
am i too cruel till i ruined their future...?? their spirit...??
is my moved made the situation more worst...??
errrmmm...
but,,,
i'm done it..
'terlajak perahu boleyh undur, terlajak perbuatan...??'
just me knew the reasons of my decision...


btw,,
i just met them this afternoon...
they told me a lot...
sorry guy...
decision hve been made...
i can't turn it back..
life must go on..
i go far to find 'peace' ...
even i didn't get what i want...
atleast i gone from 'them'...
i still love u all..
i still respect my past lecturer...
i still keep tight my memory with u all...
i left for a while...even it's to hard to meets u back..
but i promise..! i'll come back...with success..!

[HOME] ::: i'm home..!

Huh..!
Penat r...
smpi rumah trus on9 fB + myfriends2u.com + 1malaysia.com + tagged + bla..bla..bla..
(bapak bnyk....gile social web btol r...)
lek r..
bru skit je kowt...
xcmpur yg laen2 tuh..hahahahha


btw,,
i'm lil bit 'gian' dgn bende2x mcm ni r...
seb bek mase SPM dulu xwat dak alah ni...
klo x..lingkop r SPM aq mcm mne yg terjadik kat aq mase wat DIPLOMA time akhir2x sem...
mmg hancoq beb..!
tp...
apo den kesah..!
den setup badan...muke...
kasi macho skit...then now...i'm a model..
mne sangke arn...
ade rupe..badan skit..
leyh jadik model...
tuah badan arn...hahahhahaha

[Holiday] :: 4 days left..!

Diam x diam...
tinggal 4 hari jerk...(padehal bru jerr 3 hari cuti...gatal nk post entry...)
cepat jgak arn...
xsmpt nk bau ketiak ibu...da nk balik kolej...
yele...jumaat+sabtu+ ahad ibu da keje...
so..last day dpt pelok2x ibu besok je laa...
nnt rindu plak kat dye...
tp..tdy ade r kawan ibu ckp...
klo rindu..bawak r kain batik OR tuala mandi ibu tu...
mse rindu leyh ciom2x...
eeuuuwwww...
i'm not too desprate k klo bab rindu2an...
aq cool jewp...
yelaaa...i'm lil bit 'manje' dgn mum i...
tu yg mum i syg gilerr kat i..
even i nk pindah kolej pown dye mcm agree xagree jgak la...
sedeyh pown adejgak mse dye tinggalkn i kat Shah Alam...
yelaaa....takowt terkene keJOtan budaye r nk dikatekn...
kepale batakk dye...ngek ngok...!hahahhahahaha

btw,, idop perlu diteroskn..!
target nk tetapkn pointer balik sem depan..
even da tinggal 1 sem je kn..

arrghhh...!
tidaaaaakkk...!
jeles aq ngan student yg dpr PL semalam...
i spoossseee to be there..
damn PUAN R*T*...!
she's annoyed..
but ok..!
if not i'll repeat N' keep repeat the same mistake..!
ok..! da...that's all for this entries...
Gtg..! bye2x...muaxxxhh2x..!   <3 Tengku..

[Holiday] :: 3rd Day..!

Since i got holidays 4 a week...
(non-official actly...hahahah-ponteng arn...)
huh..
i've fullfilled all of it till the 3rd day..!
1st day..
dok rumah..siapkn 'suit' + uodate blog..
2nd day..
dok rumah jgak...still menyiapkn 'suit' dinner ala blink2x.. + g dinner tuh..
3rd day..
goin' to KL...with beloved mum..
she asked me to accompany her...
felt too tired loorrhh...
but...boleyh r..jenjalan arn mse cuti...(cuti amek sendiri..hahahha)
for the 4rd day...
planned to meet him..
but...i still scared to send him a mcg to meets...
what i scared he only wanna to try makesure that i wasn't a 'tttuuuutttt'...
errmmm..tp...
since i'm in primary school i lil bit admired him...
hmmmm...
is this a chance..?? OR a big mistake if i porpose him....
errrggghh....
tengku...please dont make that mistake again..!
huh..!
any choice...?
please,, gve me the 3rd option...
dont let me choose between the 2 option...please2x...i'm begging...! =='
Hoomaiggooordd...
gve strenght!!!
don't let me do the same mistake...
tengku..!
just brave yourself...
berani buat...berani tanggong..!

[HURT] ::: Errrghhh..! Pimples...

Homaaaiigod..!
Bangun pagi...gosok gigi...
gune kodomo lion... (nyanyi pepagi ni.....dgn nada xseberape nk riang....)

Arrrggghhh..!
bangun pepagi jerrkk..
terTENGOK muke kat cermin..
-OPOCOT- (melatah)
bapak banyak jerawat tumbuh kat muke aq...
kat pipi....hidung..mulot pown ade...!
tidaaakkk..!
-jerawat menggile-
xpenah2x kowt jerawat serang muke aq bnyk giler mcm ni...
adessshhh..
=='


mcm mne nk jumpe lelaki idaman aq...???
bru ingt nk jumpe dye ari ni..
sbb..
hari je r yg paling sesuai tok jumpe dye...
hmmmm...
mungkin xde rezeki lagi kowt...
OR maybe aq still leyh lagi simpan keDARAan aq nieyh...hhahahahahaa...
btw,,
mcm mne errkk nk ilang kn jerawat yg mengGILE kat muke aq ni....
errrmmm...
sakit jerr hati aq niyh...
mcm mne nk balik Shah Alam...?
mcm mne nk cri 4time...?


tidaaaakkkk...
d'lemma JERAWATTT..!

[College] :: A hard JOURNEY..!

Student College...
spatotnyerr...
just relax arn...lebeyh2x lagi...
student kolej SWASTA...
errmmm...
but...i nie..jenis active..
active bepersatuan...
i involve a lot...MF..MPP..kelab itu...kelab ini...
mcm2x r..actvt pown slalooo r jgak join..
kirenyerr...
duit i...mase i..tenage i..habes kat situ jerk...
kekadang balik rumah jejak taw kol 12 malam..
parents i pown mcm da xske jerr i BEPERSATUAN..
tp..i just phyco diorang..klo involve dpt PERSATUAN leyh tolong naekkan pointer...
trus diorang kasi join..
so..i pown da dpt green light...pe lgi...bedal je r..




Baru2x ni...
ade r KES kat kolej i...
KES KECURIAN...
kes ni berlaku time pose tahon 2011 semggu da nk raye..
terok beb..!
i kene tuduh hidop2 tuh..!
gile ke ape...semggu nk raye aq kene tuduh...
bapak menggigil kepale lutot aq...
hari2x pegi balik kolej..pegi balik balai polis wat statement..
last2x...seb bek xraye dlm lokap...
tp..ape yg i pelik...
org kat dlm cctv tu da dpt..
then..muke dye JELAS ye..saye ulangi JELAS...!
maksodnyerr...BUKAN KABOR...BUKAN XNAMPK LANGSUNG..
tp...
i dont know...kenape r fuck sngt kolej tuh...
g je r suh polis tangkap PEROMPAK tuh...
pelik..pelik...kolej management ape mcm tuh...
da r kolej cikai2x...nk namekn Management College...
errr....x SESUAI...




N b'coz of that...
i decided to move...
but..lect i xbagi i buat mcm tuh...
nnt bertambah r keyakinan diorang yg i buat KES sengal mcm tuh...
so..i pown batalkn r HASRAT tok pindah kolej..
but now..
here i'm..
i moved...tp 1 sem selepas KES tu terjadik...
cool beb..!
after i moved...jiwa lapang gilerr...!
xrase TERTEKAN...
xrase DIPANDANG SENGET..
N' xrase HUMILATED...
bebas skit r...
btw, i still tggu jawapan ntok kes tuh...


After i moved jgak...
bese r...mulot org arn...
mcm2x r andaian yg diorang buat...
mcm FUCK..!
N' i agak TERKUJAT jgak bile dngr andaian yg diorang buat...
mmg xmasok akal LANGSONG...!
HEAD of PROGRAMME pown xckp mcm tuh...
diorang plak leyh wat speculasi mcm tu ek...
bia r...mulot org...
kowt mulot tempayan..da lame aq sumbat ngan cili kering+cili padi lumat+bise ular...
biar mendidih perot masing2x...
ape yg aq leyh buat skunk ni...
just let it b...
they won't stop till their mouth static OR become 'BISU'..
that's ALLAH's power..we can't do anything till HIS wishes..
just accept QADA' n' QADAR dye jerk...
dye r yg tentukan hale hidop aq skunk ni...
selagi aq bergelar manusia...
nothing i can do..
i've no power..just KUDRAT 4 kerat je ni...
lebih baek BERSYUKUR..! n ALHAMDULILLAH...
Praise to ALLAH..!
ALLAHUAKHBAR...

Written by,,

Tengku Insaf

[DINNER] ::: Candle Night Dinner

yeah..!!
Finally almost 2 weeks i didn't meet all my beloved frens...
but today...
i got it all..
even..some of them looks SURPRISEE n' errrmmm...dont know..!


Malam tdy pown dpt jumpe b'coz ade event college r...
butir2x dye mcm ni yerk...::::~~~


Place ::: Dewan MPS..then tukar..Dewan baru depan kolej... (xtaw lagi name ape...)
Mase ::: 8.00pm to bla..bla.. bla... (tp still jgak start lambat..bese r..janji MELAYU...)
Tema ::: 1st Blink2x...then tukar Masquerade Blink2x...tukar lagi...1 Malaysia..lastly... Masokkan smuer tema...
 Masquerade Blink2x N' 1 Malaysia (mcm xde pendirian...asyek tukaq je manjang....)
Price ::: RM 16...then tukaq lgi RM 20..
Makanan ::: Nasi Beriyani ala2x Majlis Kawen...
Hiburan  ::: PA System ala2x kenduri kawen...N' ade r jgak tarian 1 MALAYSIA...
tu pown sumbangan kelab kat kolej kowt...
HAHAHAHHAHAHAH~~
N sepanjang majlis tuh...aq asyek gelakkk jerr....GELAKAN makanan diorang...errr...
seb bek xmakanan mcm makanan kucing...


Errmmm...
btw,, ade r jgak story2x yg sedap N' langsung xsedap di dngr dr diorang...
tp..malas r nk cter kat post ni...
t kat post laen i cterr k..!


Huh..!
Nk ckp pasal Dinner tdy tuh...
errr...
mcm x FAIR jerr care pengadilan Prince N' Princess Night...
Aq spatutnyerr jadik...
ramai yg sokong...tp..
bile name aq dipanggil...aq plak xdngr..!
Sengal jerrkk jahit manik penat2x...tp xdpt ape...!! heeiisshhh...
MOOD ::: Kechewe jap..!
..xpelah..
yg sampikn hadiah tu bknnyer HEADMISTRESS...
tp...org yg ala2x aq benci skit...
N mase tu..lect da balik pown...da xde yg tinggal...
tu r..mcm xsporting jerr arn...
err...biar r...lect kat situ mmg xsporting habes pown...smuerr al2x glamour + poyo jerk...


Pegi dinner tu..
aq xletak harapan tinggi pown...
xmintak pown CHICKEN CHOP...ICE BLENDED or KFC bagai...
(padehal berharap...mne xnyerr...tema HOT...bayr RM20...baik makan KFC kompem kenyang arn...)
hey..baju i pown harge lgi mahal dr fees masok taw..!! MOOD ::: menyesal skit...
xmintak pown FAIZAL TAHIR dtg nyanyi lagu SAMPAI SYURGA...(padehal berharap le sngt2x...)
tngok konsert Reunion AF pown free taw...
N' xmintak pown HADIAH cabutan bertuah MESCEDES SPORT 3 pintu...
dpt nyerr hamper hampeh biskut2x kat kedai RM2 dpt selonggok...
tp...
yg aq BERHARAP sngt2x...
dpt r jumpe kawn2x yg da 336 hours aq xjumpe...
N that night i met them...
huh..!
Lepas rindu aq..walopon xdpt PELOK diorang...hahahaha...padehal nk eyh...errrrr~~~~


K lah...
Ni je r entry tok malam nieyh..
aq pown da penat gile2x..N' skunk nkkkkkk tido..!
Good Nyte everyone..!
Sweet Dream...
=)

[STUDY] :: Errkk... ade lagi...!!

Singing :::::

Menghitung hari...

detik demi detik...

Masa...bla..blaa..blaa..hahahahaha(xingt lirik...!)

Menghitung..menanti..menunggu..!
All in one..

penat seyh...

study..study...study...

nk keje plak..!!!!!!

almost 15 years i life for study...

ye r...

Primary ::: 6 years...

Secondary ::: 7 years..( + form 6....)

Diploma ::: 2-3 years...

errrggghh...!!

seb bek xjadik hambe buku...(mcm adek aq...tp...alhamdulilah...dye succes r jgak...!)

Then October ni..start praktikal..

yeah..! xsabaq nk keje kat hotel..!

mesti best arn...especially FO (Front Office Dept)...

leyh enjoy...bergaye...jumpe MAT SALLEH...

untong2x dpt tips dr diorang..hahahah..masyuuukkk...

[Luv] :: Should i accept H.I.M..??

Okeyh..!
setibenye aq kat rumah...(cewaahh...ayat xleyh nk blah...!)
ofkos..
1st thing that i'll to do is power on my laptop N' trus on9 fB b4 menyantap hidangan bonde kat atas meja makan..
after makan, tngok2x ade r 'CHAT' dr kawan lame...
namenyerr ***rul **zaie..
perrggghh...lme kowt aq ushyaaaa mamat nieyh...
dr skolah rendah dulu...
dr segi bahase dye mule2x chatting ngan aq...
it's okay...
aq mmg borak sengal2x skit ngan dye..
then, lame2x 'chatting' kitorang da mcm 'weird' skit...
Hooomaiigod..
mcm xcaye plak dye pown spesis mcm tuh...
siap ckp bagai2x plak arn...
btw,,
i'm still in d'lemma...
all my fren really care bout me..
i scared to like that...
aq penah 'membenci' golongan seperti itu..
N' i scared i'll be like that...
tp...aq still lgi dlm proses 'berfikir'...
Accept OR Reject...
sbb..
dulu penah jgak r minat kat dye...
N now...rse serba salah plak...
i tried to change...
but..NOT to this WAY...!!
Pleaseee... gve me NUR...

[Home Sweet Home] :: Rindu kat rumah..!!

Huh..!
almost a week aq xbalik rumah...
ye r arn...peng'HIJRAH'an...
everybody needs a move..! including me...


atlast..
on 28th March 2011...at 5:34 i got a touched huge from my beloved mum..
she suprisingly when i arrived at home...
ye r arn...
rancang balik on tuesday...
tp..balik on monday plak...
mne xterkezzut..!


i took leaves for a week...
tp...mum aq xtaw pown pasal ni...
aq ckp...klas xde...
errrkkk..mcm pelik plak arn klas dibatalkn selame 'SEMINGGU'....
sengal tahap gaban...
nk menipuu pown..agak2x r skit...kih3~~


Btw,,
balik N9 ni pown bknnyerr saje2x...
tp..esok on 29th March 2011 ade MAKAN MALAM AMAL or CANDLE NITE DINNER yg bertemakan ala2x MAT SALLEH gitu...
Blink2x...
over kowt...hahahah!
nnt tngok r OVER aq plak mcm mne arn...
Hope makannannyerr berpatutan r ngan tema eyh...
tngok2x makanan 1 malaysia...HAHAHAHAHAHA~~~
mmg aq <<<===gelak guling2x r nnt..
ape2x hal pown...
kite tngok je r agenda diorang...
lgi pown..aq bkn student kolej tuh lgi..
so...
i'll gve a tough criticism...
wait N see yeaw..!

[NewLife] :: Kejutan,,,!!

Since i moved to Shah Alam...
mcm2 kejutan yg aq da kene...
errggghh...!
bunyik mcm weird...! mcm OVER pown ade jgak...hahahha
btw..i'm telling the truth..!


1st kejutan...!
is 'keZzzutan budaye' ...hahahaha...
mmg klo nk dicakapkn..
'xpayah nk kezutan budaye sngt-LAH'...
tp....tu yg aq lalui skunk ni...
1st day aq kat Shah Alam..aq trus balik kol 3 pagi...
for normal teenagers yg dok Shah Alam tu..maybe 'NORMAL' bg diorang...
tp..bukan aq k...


Then, 
'HOUSEMATE' aq...
mmg xleyh bla...
masing2x pkai krete nk up jerk...
sorang pkai 'MESCEDES'...'BMW'...'NEO' r...
bapak loaded..padehal 'STUDENT' je kowt...
tp..xpe r..mak bapak loaded..!
parents diorang carik duit pown tok diorang jgak..


3rd..
I met a guy...
perrggghh..! mulot dye...mmg xleyh bla...
..bkn mulot bau tongkang OR ala2x minx penyepak...
tp..mulot 'KERETAPI' xgeti nk tekan break...!
bercakp 24/7...
mentang2x r aq dak bru kat sne...
dye pown ikowt sedap atie r berborak ngan aq ni...
aq ni pown 1 hal...ikowt arn jerk...


Huh..!
tu r antare keZuutan yg aq dpt kat Shah Alam City...
best jgak..!

[POEM] Love = Sacrificezation

Love,
An expression,
It's hard to express,
Even with a poem, song or melody.
A feeling,
Which hard to describe,
Even with a word, sight or summer,
A wait,
Full with sacrificezation,
Body N' soul,
But touched hearted are wonderful,
That's the name of L.O.V.E

Written by,

Sara Kaca

[POEM] LOVE :: Happy, Crazy, Brave N' Honest

Love,
Sometimes make us happy,
Sometimes make us crazy,
But love, teach us how to be brave and honest to others.


Everyone in love,
either they are child, teens, adult or nearly to death,
they willing do anything for them,
even it'll hurt themselve..
For success in love, don't ever betrayed of love,
because love is too wonderful..!

Written by,

Aqma 

[POEM] Children :: Between Life and Death

Moments of life such as starting a new night ..

like a dream it is difficult for the trial ..

sometimes good and sometimes bad ..

it shows the endless future ..

is it just an illusion or reality ..

no agreement to be bound and

no words to decide ..

themselves as being in the middle of the ocean ..

just be creative and the sky blue water ..

if not aware of the dream ..

themselves will sink to the bottom ..

bitter taste for life divorced from the body ..

and time continues to pass unnoticed ..

only two choices of how children live ..

between life and death

Written by,

Syazla Kaslim

Me as TENGKU..!

Ok...
Hye guys...
This's not the first time i'm as a blogger..
btw, i'm privating my identity...
it more intresting if i make it like that...
No need to know who i'm..
but..i would like to share all my complicated daily life to u all..
i hope it not a big problem to you all yeah...

ok...for the first...
i just introduce some of my life here k..

Actly, i'm a student..
came from state wich known as nine state there are Negeri Sembilan..
btw, i moved to others place that can change me well..
i'm a college student..
my sex...much better keep it as secret..
live in half luxury family..
with caring mum and dad...
i've 5 siblings..2 sisters N' 2 brothers...
i think...that's full enough to intorduce  maself to world yeah...
wait for my next post k...
bye2x...